Thursday, April 9, 2020
GIK Acoustics - Europe
GIK Acoustics - Europe
The Moshville Times

Who the hell is…?

Dimebag Darrell

Would kick Eminem’s ass any day

Well, after being out of the country for a couple of years and (happily) ignoring television, radio and the tabloids I find myself drowning in a sea of recently famous people. Now, whether they’ll be Beatles-famous or one-album-then-ditched famous, who knows.

One thing that’s getting me are the names they’re using. I know you have to make a name for yourself, and in some cases people take this literally. The stuff they’re coming up with these days is just pants, though.

I mean, who the hell is Lady Gaga? I don’t need to check out the radio stations to know I’d loathe her stuff. Assuming it’s a “she” and not a group?

Going through the charts we have Shakira – sounds like a dodgy bit of Manga; Dizzee Rascal – made that one up in the playground at school; Beyonce – I bet there are a million of those being born in council estates every day now; Mr Hudson – wasn’t that a character in Grange Hill?; Jeremih – inspired by Pearl Jam but unable to spell; Booty Luv – oh, come on

What happened to the good old days when people had really ace nicknames? All the best ones being from the world of metal, of course. Come on – you can’t beat any of these lot with your namby-pamby radio-friendly claptrap:

Care to argue? Well don’t bother – you’re wrong. Metal has the best nicknames and pseudonyms. End of. I’m not narrow-minded. I’m just right.

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About The Author


Father of three. Teacher of Computing. PADI divemaster. Krav Maga Assistant Instructor. Geordie. Geek. Nerd. Metal nut. I also own and run a website - you may have heard of it.

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See though I would say that the only reason ‘Lemmy’ is a cool nickname is BECAUSE he’s Lemmy. He could have made the name ‘Norman’ cool.

(I quite like Lady Gaga. So sue me.)

Iain Purdie

You make a good case for Mr Kilmister, Beth. As for the Gaga thing, the papers are with my solicitor now.


Shakira – Hotness.

Iain Purdie

I’ll take your word for it. But you’re a guy who doesn’t like Eastern European eye candy on his street corner so I don’t know if I can trust your opinion :-p