Each day in the run-up to the finals, we’re doing two tracks from the 2015 Eurovision Song Competition and
tearing them to shreds analysing them carefully in a bid to predict the winner on May 23rd.
UNITED KINGDOM: Electro Velvet – “Still In Love With You”
MOSH: Remember when novelty singles were all the rage and songs like “Beep Bop Balooby” and “Ding a Dang My Ding Dong” rocked the charts and swept all before them at Eurovision? Well this brings back memories of that, only without an appropriately stupid title. The intro sounds like someone passing gas through a Bontempi organ, and the main song is ragtime meets banal pop. Catchy, I’ll give it that, but so is syphilis. 3/5
DAVE: TECHNO TECHNO TECHNO…20’s style. I saw nothing of the process for picking this song to represent the UK, so I’m purely guessing that the dance routine is going to include the Charleston at some point, with some bloke doing a comedy “talk into an old fashioned phone” skit too. This is terrible…and I can only guess that it has been chosen so that the NUL PWA can be fully deserved this time around. NUL PWA!
GEORGIA: Nina Sublatti – “Warrior”
MOSH: Oh. OK. This one’s not bad. Mainstream pop, but with a decent female vocalist and a fairly rocky feel to it. It’s nothing special other than the fact that it doesn’t suck, but that does put it above a lot of the rest of the competition. Plus Georgia share the same patron saint as England so we’re kind of related. 4/5
DAVE: Sorry Spain, but it’s over between us. The song isn’t great, but Nina is. Hello Nina (just in case she is reading) – how you doing? 5/5