ArseBucket (I’m assuming nickname, deed poll whilst drunk or very cruel parents) wrote in to ask:
“There’s a lot in the news about the government thinking of sending the army to Syria. Should they do it or not?”
Ah, war. Conflict. Battles and rejoinders, forces moving back and forth across countries and continents.
Mind you, it’s not how it was in my day. None of these silly missiles and bombs which leave bodies in such a terrible condition they’re not even fit for a gristly stew. Back when wars were proper wars, we could carve a big chunk out of one of you humans and make sure all of the organs were nicely untouched so we could marinade them later. Worst case we have to yank a few arrows out.
These days, by the time you find the nice bits they’re all covered in grit. Or you end up cracking your tooth on some shrapnel.
Seriously, humans have screwed war up completely. Where’s the fun in having a good old battle if you can’t eat your enemy afterwards?
War? Huh? What is it good for? Absolutely nothing any more. Not even a few stringy sausage rolls.
[Nekrogoblikon’s Power is out now! If you want your problem dealt with by Auntie Goblin then drop her a line.]